The Sex, Porn & Love Addiction Podcast

Negative Core Beliefs sabotage Sex Addiction Recovery

Gary McFarlane Episode 110

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Negative Core Beliefs are often hidden from view. Often disguised; but masquerade as truths.

They live in the unconscious. Not easily touchable. They work away in the hidden place doing their worst. They are uninvited guests. They have over stayed their invitation; live rent free and are doing damage, which adversely impacts quality of living life. They need to be gone after and expelled.

Since you cannot change that which you cannot see - because they live in the unconscious - you have to go hunting for them. Get your hunting gear on. We are going hunting.

Remember 'C' first, then 'B' follows in CBT. Your (C)ognitive will always lead to your eventual (B)ehaviour. Don't try to first change the 'B'. Begin with the 'C'. Negative Core Beliefs are a part of the 'C'.

You need to find them, recognise them, acknowledge them, highlight them, then get ready to turf them out - as you progress through the Change Process.

What are these 'Negative Core Beliefs'? They are an individuals most central ideas and Beliefs about themselves (and can also be about others and the world). They act as a lens through which the person takes their vantage point - through which they view self, life and experiences. They can be all encompassing. Very global. Very rigid Beliefs.

Negative Core Beliefs are Harmful Core Beliefs. They lead to Negative Thoughts, Feelings and Behaviours. Examples are: 'I am a failure', 'I am weak', 'I am unloveable', 'No one likes me', 'I don't deserve....', 'People can't be trusted'.

They are hard to own and accept that they have been bought into; yet, they have been in residency for years, rent free (would you believe it!)

Time to see them out; on their way; good riddance; hasta la vista.

Understand that over time, keeping them going is arduous, labour intensive (without knowing it) and leads to an increased desire to self-soothe by 'Acting out'. That is why Negative Core Beliefs are a big deal in the Recovery Process.

Get some help from The Kairos Centre: bit.ly/pornaddictionhelp

Gary McFarlane (BA, LLM, Dip, Certs), Accredited EMDR Practitioner.

Episode Keywords: Sex Addiction | Porn Addiction | Love Addiction | Porn Causes | Recover from Addiction | Self-Soothing Behaviors | Childhood Trauma | Inner Child work | Childhood Development and Addiction bullying | Porn Addiction Recovery | Abuse | Sexual Abuse | Sex Addiction Recovery | Domestic Violence | Family Conflict | Overcoming Porn addiction | Porn Addiction Side effects | Porn Addiction Symptoms | Emotional Neglect | Quit Porn Addiction | Peer Pressure | Performance Pressure | Separation | Divorce | Fear | Anxiety | Stress | Mental Health and Addiction | Dissociation | Anger | Husband has porn | Recovery Program | 12 Steps Program | EMDR | Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing | Compulsive Behavior | Trauma Healing | Neuroplasticity | Online Therapy | The Kairos Centre | Neuroscience of Addiction | Porn Addiction Help | Sex Addiction Recovery Program | Authentic Self Discovery | Compulsive Behaviors | Intimacy Issues | Sexual Dysfunction | Obsessive Thoughts | Fantasy Escape | Codependency | Shame in Addiction | Guilt in Addiction | Addiction in Relationship | Infidelity | Therapy for Addiction | Objectification | Hypersexualization | Pornography Industry | Attachment Styles | Sexual Compulsivity | Behavioral Therapy | Relapse Prevention | Emotional Regulation | Self-Discovery | Healing Journeys | Personal Growth | Intimacy Building | Healthy Re